For us who like our games to have deep significance and like to be driving impossibly fast vehicles or blasting zombies with extraordinarily improbable weaponry, this is a really boring game. However for kids just starting out with games who have not yet seen the reality of the adults world its just about passable.
Super Gamer Dude
Hello Kitty Cruisers is not a very bad game but it is a pretty bad game when you look at the graphics. It does look like a Wii game or a GameCube game but, hold on, take a look at the cover, it doesn't really lead you to expect a highly sophisticated gamer orientated game. If the title doesn't give it away the cover art should and the rating may be just enough to warn the prospective buyer that it is a child's game. So having established its demographic we can accept the graphical content as being adequate for the task in hand. It is happy, bright and colorful. Why does it have to have super graphics when it can just be colorful and bright and happy.
Unfortunately, even for a kid's game there are a lot of negatives. Although there are quite a few characters to pick from, only a couple are unlocked at the very beginning. but there are more as you progress. Every single vehicle control is the same, all the cars control the same, all the boats control the same, all the planes control the same. The boats behave like cars on ice but, on second thoughts, real boats sort of skid and drift rather than grip the water. I must keep reminding myself that I'm too grown up for this sort of thing. When you are driving cars, pointing boats or aiming planes, whatever the technical terms are, there is not a lot to do with them. Do I aim my plane in a right hand circle or a left hand one? Do I aim over a bridge or under it? All the tracks and courses are pretty uninteresting but those later in the game are a little less so.
There are power ups, like you see in those really grown up Mario games, and speed bursts, and cup cakes which you can chuck at people. There are also clocks which seem to have the effect of slowing everything else down rather than speeding you up as you might expect. But again it has the effect of giving you an advantage but it does make an unexciting game even less exciting. There are no modes of selectable difficulty. Only one mode, slow and leisurely.
So for us who like our games to have deep significance and like to be driving impossibly fast vehicles or blasting zombies with extraordinarily improbable weaponry, this is a really boring game. However for kids just starting out with games who have not yet seen the reality of the adults world it's just about passable. I'll have to see what my youngest thinks of it when his incredibly grown up teenage brother and me have finished playing it through many times to find as many faults as we can while he is whacking the hell out of some oriental looking martial arts freak. Karate kicks. Cup cakes? Horses for courses.
All being said it's a kids game and should be rated as such. I'll give it six from ten.
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